11 months....

...boo hoo.

Almost to a year and I am awed and amazed at how much my baby bug has grown and changed.

It seems like yesterday that we found out we were having a baby girl .

No way time has gone this fast. Didn't my water just break like a few days ago?

Be prepared, blog friends, to see a tear streaked, tear stained posts the next month or so as I make this pilgrimage to celebrate my Baby's 1 year accomplishment to turning a year old! How amazing. How bittersweet.

She's so stinkin' cute that I still can't believe I made her.

I can't believe she has two new chompers and keeps on cutting more to add to her collection of pearly whites.

I am amazed that she's standing on her own, taking hesitant, wobbly steps...all the while looking at me with her proud, smiley, scrunch face that makes my heart fall into a bazillion pieces...

I love that she wants to eat everything I put in front of her and am equally disgusted at watching her shove food in her mouth, spit it out, then put it right back in and chomp away.

I love that she points to her mouth, eye, nose, and tummy and says with confidence "mow (mouth), nose (umm...nose), and eye...tummy she doesn't say - she just points.

My heart swelled with pride as she looked at me one afternoon while eating lunch - put her two fists together - and clearly said "MORE!" After showing my Girl since she was 4 months old...she finally did it back.

She's doesn't say "I love you" but she shows me now that she lets me hold her and rock her. There is a bit of magic in the air when she looks up at me, lays her head on my shoulder and wraps her arms around my neck - then closes her eyes and sleeps while I sit, completely silent, fearful to ruin this absolute moment of perfection.


11 months...

Blessed.

Truly blessed.

On conference calls. She's a V.I.B. (Very Important Baby)


Ugh..she's amazing!!

Happy 11 months Iz!!

Adieu

Isabelle is almost 11 months old.

I don't know where time has gone.

I can't believe that not so long ago I was so focused on losing the baby weight and getting into shape. I probably should have paid more attention to my bundle of joy rather than working my tail off to get back into shape.

But, its 10+ months post baby and I can finally say I am back at my pre-pregnancy weight - maybe even a pound under.

Notice - I said "weight." Not body. I don't think my body will ever be what it was before.

Since I created a human being, carried life, and birthed an eternal soul (I have to really talk up the birthing process or I'll just cringe at the remnants of pregnancy ie - stretch marks, linea nigra that is STILL there...) - my tum, tum isn't quite the picture of perfection.

Since I nursed and gave nourishment to Isabelle for 9 months from my own body - my bubbies have fallen prey to gravity. Picture a balloon from a birthday party (my bubbies at 20)...then the days go by and slowly the air seeps out and balloon looks sad, deflated (my bubbies post baby at 30).

I remember longing for the days of my skinny jeans, tube tops, short skirts, and heels. I would grumble as I put on nursing tank after nursing tank, stretchy yoga pants, and flip flops or tennis shoes once again.

But now that I can fit into my old clothes, I have no reason to keep around the nursing bras, nursing tanks, maternity sweats, elastic waist shorts, balloon like dresses, and B.O.P.s (Big.Ole.Panties)...

And you know what - I miss them.

So what if I don't nurse anymore...can't my nursing tops/tanks/bras still double as some sort of sexy peekaboo article of underwear?

So what if I no longer have my baby belly...can't my maternity sweats and elastic waist shorts still be used as "work out" gear and laundry day clothes (but the problem is...I'm in them ALL the time...and let's be real....I'm not "working out" or "laundering" 24/7).

Can't the balloon dresses be paired with a cute belt and double as some sort of trendy baby doll dress? But then the whole..using the dress as a way to eat my weight in french fries and a let my gut hang out and not have to suck in...purpose of the dress would be lost.

And the B.O.P.s. - so dang comfy. So what if it looks like I'm wearing 1940's bloomers underneath my jeans! The normal undies - the ones that just cover the important lady bits - as pretty and lacy and satiny as they are...just don't give me the same sense of comfort as my B.O.P.s....

But, it's time.

I bid adieu to my friends that kept me clothed in comfort for 18+ months (yes..I was wearing maternity clothes 4 weeks into my pregnancy...anything to get into the elastic waist band...).

Adieu dear friends...adieu....

Lucky One

It's almost time to celebrate a day just for me.
Or for all the women in world who's first name is now "Mommy."

Who would've thought there'd be a day set aside for my "everyday."
A day that once upon a time - I would only have when I prayed...

For the bundle of joy that captured my heart the moment I saw her face.
For each smile, each laugh, each tear that she's cried - time will never erase.

For the baby bottles here and there and toys scattered on the floor.
For the crazy love in the pit of my stomach - realizing everyday - I love her more.

In this moment - I'm the center of her world - just like she is mine.
I know I can't fight the one thing I hate the most...and that is the speed of time.

As days turned to weeks and weeks to months...soon we'll be at a year...
It feels like yesterday that I held her in my arms - and wiped away her very first tear.

She made me a mom, teaches me motherhood - with every triumph and every trial.
No matter how difficult the road has been - it's worth it when I see her smile.

Cards in the store - the well wishing for me - all the "she's lucky to have you" - I've heard.
But there's a secret I have - come close as I whisper - listen to every word...

The joy that I have as I watch my heart grow every single day.
Sure she's lucky to have me - but face it - without her - I'd be lost along the way.

I'm the lucky one - it's me - she's my gift - a gift beyond measure.
There's nothing more precious or valuable than her - my role as Mommy - I'll always treasure.

Happy Mother's Day to all my blog mommies!

10 months old!

I have a 10 month old baby girl that reached the double digits on the 19th.

I can't believe it.

Iz has 4 teeth - one I lovingly call her "snaggle tooth."

She has taken 2 steps, is a cruising machine, stands on her owns, sings to her shoes, squeals at her doggies, loves on her Daddy, lays her head on her Momma, sleeps in until 6:30 am (ugh), eats everything and anything I put in front of her, plays nicely in her Pack N' Play but screams bloody murder in her 15x15x15 ft play area, says "uh oh" and throws her toys, shakes her head and says "no, no, no" when she crawls towards danger zones, talks and talks and sings and sings in her crib until you come and get her.

She's amazing and I can't believe how fast she's grown.

Love you, Bug!